Dedication to Die-Bitch..

This post is a dedication to the memory of one of the dumbest and most stupid dogs ever to roam the hostels of NITK- Die Bitch. I first remember it from my 2nd year in the 3rd hostel block. It was such a dumb dog that it used to wag its tail at those who shouted abuses at it. Poor thing it once got stuck in the collapsible gate  and howled  and howled for over an hour while all the guys who cared for it tried to rescue it.

And then in the 3rd year it stabbed us all and went off to 8th block probably for greener pastures (read better leftovers from the better acclaimed 8th block mess). We could spot it once in a while dangling itself from a window sill trying to accomplish God-only-knows-what. This lead some of the guys to make Die-Bitch part of ludicrous PJs like:

What would you call Die-Bitch if it died by getting electrocuted in the powerhouse?

Ans: Dead Bitch!!

She became some sort of a celebrity when she had an Orkut community just for her and her fans. But DB’ s influence and presence diminished vastly in the 3rd year and now, in the final year, as I was once passing through the Hockey field, I saw a the rotting body of a dog and so decided to take the longer way around. Little did I know that the body was that of DB’s.

There are various theories put forth  to explain the sad and untimely demise of DB. None so credible than the possibility of it getting repeatedly humped by the big pack of lecherous dogs that beat around the NITK campus looking for easy preys. I mean that its a big possibility considering all the scenes that we final year guys have been witnessing outside the 8th block and Final block. Sample this:

Just the other night, at around 8, I go to final block to have my dinner and upon entering the block, I find a dog and its bitch involved in what can be termed as a feverish experience to the two. 20 minutes later, I finish my dinner and head back and what do I see? Their feverish experience is apparently yet to reach its climax! God damn it man!

And the other night, there was this huge orgy wherein all the dogs had unanimously decided to screw all rules and party! And what a sight it was! (I am about to puke…)

Thus considering these recent sightings, it is only fair to presume that DB died due to the excessive humping  it received at the hands of God-only-knows how many dogs.

And thus, in the end, Die Bitch truly lived up to its name and now, as a thing of the past, it is truly a Dead Bitch.

Rust in Peace.

About Akshay N R

Civil Engineer by Profession; Dudeist by Religion. Also allergic to mediocrity.

Posted on August 15, 2007, in My sense of Humour, NITK. Bookmark the permalink. 10 Comments.

  1. That’s what I call Doggy Style…. man, A bitch [ literally] getting an orkut community.. .Can’t figure out who’s more lame… Is it orkut? or the dumbies who created the community..

    Humpax…. man u should join CSI…[ the series, not the dumb club]…

  2. Man..the guys who created and ran that community live right upstairs….you may not know..but there was a lot of enthusiasm involved in that community!

  3. You should have video taped that dog orgy…I’m sure it would have been a youtube hit!

  4. Oh yeah! Damn! Too bad I didnt have my cam then!

  5. @ King Steve, true, people will watch anything as long as its free… A dog orgy would be an instant hit….

    @ Akshay…. filming a dog’s private moments might have boosted ur popularity ratings in the college.. he he

  6. @ Upadhyay
    Ah yes .. unfortunately, us lower mortals don’t have the privilege of being in elite orkut communities such as you do .. What was it again? Electronics geeks??

  7. @ Yeah Sure [ whothisis?]
    I’m a member of die-bitch community, u whore..I was just mocking the creators who created a whole community of die-bitch worshippers. And at orkut, which is justified, I guess.

    Anyways, To Die-Bitch, who died in vain, and intense anal pain, who made NITK a better place to live in.
    She shall be remembered forever, atleast through that orkutty space, or this amazing biography courtesy N.R

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