Of ‘Sacs’ and Grudges…WTF?

I had to write this! This shit is perhaps the most incredible thing I have gotten to witness over a couple of weeks! Truly unbelievable! And at the risk of sounding too condescending, let me also say it was just plain dumb! Here is what happened:

I had been to my grandmother’s home today in the afternoon to attend some annual we-all-remember-our-great-grandmother-day where the entire pot bellied brethren-most of whom have already resigned to just lead a vicarious life through their kids- found themselves in one place with their kids, in order to, well, remember the great grandmother! I happened to see a few of those kids after a long time and found that they had quite grown up. One dude was just beginning to explore the nuances of college freedom-and it soon became evident he was not quite ready for it. Then there was this other dude who suddenly claimed he was now studying for his Tenth Board Exams! I mean the last time I saw this kid, he was being an integral part of a typical South Indian marriage scene by acting out the part of the kid pestering his dad to buy him one of those cool(??!!??) plastic toy guns from the Balloon-wala who was standing in front of the Marriage hall sporting a supercilious attitude! This dude has a very troubled past filled with self abuse. Not the wrist slitting or drug consuming kind. I am talking about the getting oneself injured kind. And to this guy, injuries take a whole different meaning altogether. He used to have atleast 2 fractures a month and once even fell from a height of 5 feet over an iron pipe- with his legs on either side of it! Thats right! He hit the ‘Sac’! So much so, he had to get it stitched back! Ah! Imagine that! Getting your ‘Sac’ stitched back! ( It is also said that he held his ‘Sac’ with his bare hands for over an hour at school before the teacher noticed blood flowing on the floor!) So it was a little hard to believe he was actually in Tenth now but I presumed he was indeed talking the truth.

Now you see the thing is, among all the kids on my mother’s side (the great-grandmother also from my mother’s side), I am the eldest and so by default get to play Big Brother and sometimes even Godfather to these kids. From time immemorial, I have officially been the ’smart kid’ or the ‘intelligent kid’ in the family(now of course having transitioned to the ’smart graduate’). So every other kid in the family have at one time or the other, been told, quite explicitly, by their parents,  to emulate me through some very inspirational one-liners such as: “You know Akshay Anna’s(brother’s) best friend? Books! You should also read books. Then you will also become like him” and “If you work hard, like Akshay does, then even you will get 1st Rank, like AKshay does!” (Ok when the f*** was the last time I actually stood first in my class?)

So you see, I have been the role model and the source of inspiration for all the family kids. These two now grown up kids were no exceptions. From day one of their schooling, they were taught to emulate me, and maybe even connived to do one better than me! I am not sure about the results, but I never heard of them going one better than me. Not to worry.

Now before I get to the crux of this dumb shit, it has to be notified here that I was at one time a very good chess player and during my more enthusiastic days, I had taught these two kids how to play chess. Again, they were taught to emulate my skill in the game by their parents. I remember to have played some really short lived games during the time I was teaching them the basics of strategy. And it so happened that there was this huge break when I had completely forgotten that I was once a chess maniac and instead began to focus on issues of more importance like IIT-JEE and AIEEE. And the last time I played a game of chess was about 3 years back.

Now, coming back to the day, the lunch meal for this occassion, as per tradition, was deliberately made to be as inedible as it can be made. And so after going through the mandatory ordeal of the lunch, I finally was able to just sit and do nothing. Or so I thought. Suddenly these two now-grown-up kids proposed they play a game of chess with me. I was surprised by their enthusiasm and thought to myself: Ok I am meeting them after a long time. I might as well play a game with them. But then I knew there was no chess set at my Granny’s place and told those kids so. But lo and behold! These dudes had apparently suspected that and had got their own chess set! I was again a bit surprised but proceeded to arrange the pieces to play against the more hyper active kid-The kid with the stitched ‘Sac’. It was then that I heard his equally enthusiastic Dad comment loudly to no one in particular: “He has come here solely to play chess with Akshay anna and to beat Akshay anna!”

WTF??? I mean WTF??? Apparently this dude’s sole purpose of visit was to prove that he had become better than me at chess and as an extension, better than me in general! It suddenly looked like he had been nurturing this desire of his to beat me at Chess for quite many years. It was as if he had been preparing for years together just for this one match! In fact, I could sense some kind of a grudge he had against me. For what? I have no clue. But as he began to play, it was not difficult to see he was playing with a purpose and a well prepared plan of attack! With some vigorous body language, he seemed to tell me his life will somehow attain some meaning when he beats me in that game!

Fifteen minutes and 25-30 moves later, I find I have won. Apparently he had improved over the years, but not enough to challenge my out of touch brain cells! And then immediately I hear statements like: “You were lying when you said you have not played since 3 years.” and “Do you play at the State Level?” and “Do you go for Chess training?” and “You are a very good liar!”

Again, WTF?? I play a game of chess with this dude, partly for old times sake and partly not to disappoint him and now I find him trying to justify what he feels is possibly the worst defeat of his entire life!!! And as I began to acknowledge the other dude’s request to play a game with him, I saw this guy suddenly become very silent and non responsive. I didn’t pay much attention to it till the time his mother came out and said,”Why are you crying? Oh you are crying because you lost a match to Akshay anna? Dont worry, you learn from him about the different moves and strategies. He will help you!” And THAT crushed him real bad! He made a big effort to hold back his tears and disappointment. But for all his efforts, it was pretty clear he had imploded! Again, WTF? Wake up kid! Get a life! Its just a game of chess!

But in the end, I had to give him some advice on improving his chess and none more important and necessary than what Jason Statham said in REVOLVER : “You can only get smarter by playing a smarter opponent!” (Ah! How appropriate!)

The other dude also had similar aspirations. But his was less of a grudge and more of a dream to beat me at Chess. I will leave you to guess the outcome of that game. And again, after the game, the parents of both the kids gave some parental advice about how they should follow my example and learn from me, directly asking me to offer them advice on how THEY should shape THEIR futures. Me being the officious kind, started on my usual dose of Anti-Software and Anti-ENgineering content and saw them losing interest and so changed my stance to just Anti-Software, after which their attention was revived!

And so at the end of the day, their parents again directly asked me in front of the kids to give them some more advice the next time they met! I smiled at them and enthusiastically replied “ANYTIME!!!” And so thus ended the day, me still undefeated and still the guy to beat!

BETTER LUCK NEXT TIME KID!

PS: All the facts mentioned in this post are 100% true, including (and especially) the ‘Stitching of the Sac’.

750+590=1340

And if you don’t understand what the title means, then nevermind about the rest of the post.

So is it good enough? I don’t f***in’ care! Is it over? You god damn right its over!

After having lived with silent guilt for over a year, I am just happy to have finally righted my wrong. Could I have done better? Maybe, maybe not. But frankly speaking, I am in absolutely no mood to contemplate the ifs and buts anymore. Its over and thats all that matters.

TOEFL is day after tomo. Will get over with that too.

The Night of The Black Dog…

Considering the fact that the number of comments to this post hit double digit even before any content was uploaded, I decided to upload the content lest certain people doubt the veracity of my claims. But more importantly I had to upload the content to brush aside certain highly improbable and demeaning claims made by fellow alcoholic blogger Logik.

Me and My Black Dog

Now before you comment on the photo, I would like to thank you for your appreciation of my exceptional photography skills. It took a lot of trial and error to finalize the settings for the photo to create maximum effect!
Anyway, so that was what I wanted to write about. About how I very constructively blew my first salary. That’s what this is all about.  After having waited impatiently for a long time, ever since I first tasted some excellent Scotch whisky in the form of Chivas Regal, I was finally able to buy some myself. It was just that I wanted to buy it from my own money. And that finally took shape in the form of my first salary wherein I spent a cool 1500 bucks to get 2 bottles of Black Dog Scotch Whisky-Aged 12 Years! And so amidst the cool breeze, began THE NIGHT OF THE BLACK DOG!
This time it was just my cousin who introduced me to the marvel that is Scotch, my Dad and me savouring the smooth 12 years old whisky with select songs by Jethro Tull playing in the background. I mainly chose Black Dog due to my prior memorable experience with it when I had been to the Kenny G concert wherein they had served Black Dog as a complimentary gesture. And it was worth every drop that went in me. And when I deeply inhaled and took in the fragrance of the age old Scotch, I realized that this was what they called The Sweet Smell of Success…
As the night rolled on, Dad started “My Experiments with Alcohol-Pre Marriage” and it was nice to hear from him some of his early trysts with Old Monk Rum. I began to talk about how in one of my Post B.Tech High series, me and my fellow Alcoholics (Logik and Shiverbay) were well, drinking alcohol (what else?), listening to Hey Joe by Jimi Hendrix and simultaneously belting juniors in DC++. Of course, I was the renowned COW INSPECTOR on the Hub and then some dude popped up a “Hey Cow!” on the Main Chat. The drunk state I was in, I was curious to see who it was. That dude’s nick was JOE and so we typed “HEY JOE!!!” and then we couldn’t stop ourselves from rolling on the floor and laughing! If you ask what’s the funny part, well then I can clearly say you have never been drunk in your life! (Get a life!) But at that time, we just couldn’t control ourselves. And as I was explaining this to my Dad, he looked at me if I was alright or already high. And so I further explained that it seemed funny then and not any other time. ( Damn the generation gap! )

The One that Eats, Sleeps and Screws around..

 

And then the time came for what Logik would now term as the Clichéd Midnight Inebriated Walk. Well my cousin and I did have the walk and Blackie(see photo), the other Black Dog  which eats, sleeps and humps, followed us outside its territorial boundaries and in the process made a sincere effort to make its presence felt by leaving copious amounts of you-know-what everywhere it went! And as we trekked up the steep road, Blackie suddenly disappeared, only to reappear on our way down. Apparently there were about 8-10 cantankerous dogs just a small distance up the slope and if this thing had gone up there, I really doubt if it would have come back down. And so as we made the return walk, high on Black Dog, and in the company of the Black Dog, THE NIGHT OF THE BLACK DOG finally ended.

And so now let me focus on the dubious and baseless claims made by fellow alcoholic blogger Logik. Firstly, he claims that the makers of the highly potent Mysore Lancer have come up with a product to rival Black Dog and aptly named it Die Bitch- presumably in memory of the hostel bitch which died due to excessive humping!  And he further claims that Die Bitch can beat up the Black Dog with ease. Well, rest assured, as the Die Bitch will never come as far as Black Dog. The only consequence of this whole act would be the second coming of the “Die Bitch Humping”-and this time courtesy Blackie, the other Black Dog which eats, sleeps and humps for a living.

 

So people behold the unrivalled domination of THE BLACK DOG! No Die (or DEAD) Bitch can come anywhere close!

And before I forget, THE NIGHT OF THE BLACK DOG saw only ONE of the TWO bottles being emptied. The other bottle is still fully intact.
CALLING ALL FELLOW ALCOHOLICS FROM NITK TO SHARE THE REMAINING BLACK DOG!

PS: I was listening to Budapest by Jethro Tull when I was high and I couldn’t help but substitute the phrase “Hot Night in Budapest” with “The Night of The Black Dog”! And it was actually fun doing it-then.

At a Loss for Words…..

If there is one thing that I am sure of about myself, it is that good stuff very rarely happens by itself to me. The kind of stuff that happens just by pure luck or co-incidence. That stuff hardly takes place with me. But when it does take place, it makes it big. Real big. And so was the case when I bumped into someone special yesterday after a gap of about a decade. There were so many ways things could have gone other than the way they eventually turned out, prior to me seeing her. At that moment of realization when I was face to face with her, I suddenly got transported to a dream. To a dream I had been undeniably fantasizing ever since I can remember. And things suddenly became very surreal. “Is it really you?” “Yes it is me!” “Then HI!” “Hi!” And then I say, “ And oh yes, Happy Birthday!” And only after I wish her, I realize that it is her birthday. “Hey thanks!” And she offers me some sweets.

What did we speak next? I have no damn idea! But what I do know is that I half expected her to say bye after 5 minutes of talking. But instead she said, “ Can we go have some tea? I am really hungry!” And what did I reply? Well, what the hell else do you think I replied? But what did  I do? Well, apart from trying to fathom the magnitude of this sudden stroke of lady luck, and realizing that I had been waiting for and imagining this moment for so damn long, I really do not recollect much.  Meeting her once more in my life was something  I never really believed in. And meeting her on her birthday and spending 90 minutes with her, watching her talk while she treated me was something I had dared not to even conjure up in my head. And so, all the time, I was just floating in air, not able to believe and accept the fact that all this was actually taking place. 

She told me she had read my complete blog just the previous day and so knew practically everything about what I was upto. So there wasn’t much I had to tell her to fill her in. And so she spoke a lot, and I listened, happy to just drop an opinion or a comment here and there. But it wasn’t as much about the talk as it was about the fact that this whole thing was really happening. The suddenness of the situation left me at a complete lack of relevant things to say. All this while, I had imagined over and over again what to tell her when I would meet her, and here she was-right in front of me- and all I was talking about was some useless stuff about how I consider alcohol not to be an addiction and stuff like that! I tried to recollect all the things that I always wanted to tell her but the best I could do was to just repeatedly tell her how she hadn’t changed a bit and about how difficult it was for me to comprehend the sudden meeting. I also happened to tell her that frankly, for quite some time, I half expected someone-anyone- to suddenly tell me that she had got married. She just laughed at that! And what also happened was that it wasn’t ‘anyone’ who told me she was getting married. She herself did. She told me the groom hunt was on and that anytime now, she could find a suitable match- match being defined as an approval from her parents. And that news didn’t as much shock or disappoint me as it brought me to accept the eventual reality that I had been simply over-ruling-the fact that people I know will never get married!

90 minutes is a long time if you have to wait in a queue or for a concert to start. But it surely is the fastest duration of time that you would have ever gone through when you are living your long fantasized and hopelessly unfulfilled desire of meeting someone special for just one more time. It was quite literally, a dream come true. And so as I finally parted in the evening, I felt that perhaps I had indeed seen her for the last time. And like last time around, I just wished our meeting didn’t have to end. But it did. And amidst all that sudden development of events, I realized, albeit a bit too late, that I had blown my chance of fulfilling that one other high school dream of mine, and that that one thing will be a wish unfulfilled- always. And in spite of that, I found I had a genuine smile plastered on my damn face- again (the last time being the day I got stoned after my project submission at the end of Final Semester in NITK.) Atleast now, I have something to draw from my memory bank whenever I want to.

Like I said, it was all too surreal for me. It still is. It might have all been just a dream. The way things happened so suddenly and so very much in my favor- its really hard to believe. I usually don’t write emotional and sentimental posts. But this one warranted an exception to be made. And so here I am-telling the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth. God Help Me…

Jethro Tull in India

Finally!!!FINALLY!!!!!!!!!!!!!! How desperately I have waited… How I have fantasised about this ever since I first listened to Tull! Finally this dream is going to come true. Jethro Tull is coming down to India in November and will be touring 5 cities here. And fortunately for me, I am in one of them. I wasnt last time around when they came to Bangalore. But I am here right now and going nowhere. So here are the details:

Jethro Tull touring India in November/December 2008 with Anoushka Shankar, the daughter of Pandit Ravishankar. Tull will be touring Bangalore, Mumbai, New Delhi, Hyderabad and Kolkata with the dates and venues also given below (Thanks to Stuntmanmike-see comments-, I was able to make some corrections to the tour dates.)

1. 27/11/08 : Kolkata, Science City Auditorium

2. 29/11/08 : Mumbai, Shanmukhnanda Auditorium

3. 30/11/08 : New Delhi, Hamsadhwani Amphitheatre

4. 2/12/08 : Hyderabad, Hi Tech City Auditorium

5. 3/12/08 : Bangalore, Palace Grounds

I do not have the information about the venues in Bangalore and Kolkata. Not that I am really concerned about Kolkata, or for that matter about any of the other cities. (Frankly speaking I am really worried if anyone is going to even turn up to see Tull in Hyderabad or Kolkata!) I do not know where the concert is going to be held. Looks like its going to be an indoor concert in some auditorium. But I do not know which one. So in case any of you Tull fans know more than me, please do share it here. Will update if I learn anything myself.

And btw, I came across this website which has been documenting Tull Concerts since before Tull itself! They have the set list of every damn Tull concert.  Of  late, this is what the set list has been:

My Sunday Feeling, Living In The Past, Serenade To A Cuckoo, Nursie, A Song For Jeffrey, Sossity You’re A Woman/Reasons For Waiting, Farm On The Freeway, Bourée, A New Day Yesterday (incl. Kelpie), Too Old To Rock’N'Roll…, We Used To Know/With You There To Help Me, Dharma For One (incl. drum solo & Count The Chickens), Heavy Horses, Thick As A Brick, Aqualung, Locomotive Breath.

They are also expected to play some new Indo-Celtic fusion compositions.

 I really wish they play something, anything from Roots to Branches. And I would go hyeterical if they would play Budapest or Bungle in a Jungle. But nothing is going to stop them from playing one of the greatest discoveries of my life: Aqualung. So as long as they play that, I am more than happy to have paid for my ticket. And as far as Anoushka Shankar is concerned, she is just a bonus on my ticket!

SO you coming???

Def Leppard in India- Tour Cancelled!!

UPDATE: DEF LEPPARD HAVE CANCELLED THEIR INDIA TOUR ONCE AGAIN-THIS TIME DUE TO SECURITY REASONS. VERY UNFORTUNATE! YOU CAN FIND THE OFFICIAL CONFIRMATION HERE. THE NOTIFICATION WAS PUT UP ON 10TH OCTOBER JUST 1 WEEK PRIOR TO THEIR SCHEDULED SHOW!

The following is what I had written prior to the notification:

Ok let me get this straight. I am not an ardent follower of Def leppard. Though I have listened to a few songs and liked them, I do not consider myself crazy about them. But as my policy goes, I will be attending every damn concert that takes place in Bangalore. What with me having my own money now! So I presume I will be attending the Def Leppard Concert too at Bangalore when it takes place on October 17th, a Friday at Palace Grounds. (THey will be going to Mumbai on 19th October). In case you are not aware, they were supposed to have come sometime in May but due to the State Elections, it was post phoned. Thank God they are at least going to be here. The ticket prices are not yet out and in case they are, I am not aware of them. Will update once I learn anything new.

And BTW, I came across this website which supposedly got hold of the set list for the India tour that was supposed to be held in May. Maybe they will not retain the same setlist. But either way, here is the set list as quoted in that website:

01. Rocket 
02. Animal 
03. Let’s Get Rocked 
04. Foolin’
05. Mirror Mirror 
06. Nine Lives 
07. Love Bites 
08. (Bass Solo) 
09. Rock On 
10. Two Steps Behind 
11. Bringin’ on the Heartbreak 
12. Switch 625 
13. Hysteria 
14. Armageddon It 
15. Photograph 
16. Pour Some Sugar on Me 

Encore: 
17. Rock of Age

So I guess I am going to make myself listen to all the above songs, especially the ones I havent heard. I recently got hold of the entire collection on a CD. So no problems with the resources.

WIll update when I learn something new.

PS: Needless to say, there will be a review on the concert once I attend it.

III Block Night Canteen Beckons……

 

What do you do when you just refuse to get sleep and want to go eat something? Now I dont know. I guess I just drink some water and try getting some sleep anyway. But some time ago, there was this thing called III Block Canteen at NITK.

“Swami, Ondu Half Fry matthe ondu Lassi….Swalpa Bega Kodi!!”

And somehow I was always captivated by the menu, so obnoxiously explicit in its acknowledgement of the fact that the canteen owner was more interested in the prices part rather than the item part, that I had to do this piece of free publicity. But of course, this was the state of the menu sometime in March this year. I would really like to know what the state is now though. Any updates anyone?

PS: Photos Courtesy Paul Savio

Atonement by Ian McEwan: A Book Review

Ian McEwan’s Atonement is much more than just a novel. It is a supreme work of literature. With the ability to imbibe beautifully crafted sentences that convey a lot more than just a story, McEwan has demonstrated a unique and unparalleled talent to tell the story by laying stress on giving a convincing description of the thoughts of his characters. And so, as you savor one by one, the stream of the characters’ thoughts, it is not long before you realize that Atonement ceases to be just any other novel and instead, it assumes the shape of a delightful portrayal of psychological realism. The innocently dangerous thoughts of a 13 year old, the desperate battle for the will to survive amidst a war, the unreasonable demands and wishes of nine year olds, the tragedy of a hope, the reality of war, the desire to atone- all find a place in this magnificent meta-fictional novel.

 

Atonement opens with Briony Tallis, a 13 year old aspiring writer, preparing a play to be performed on the occasion of her brother, Leon’s homecoming. There is an evident lack of focus in the opening pages, with the scenes largely drifting along Briony’s thoughts. It is however not long before all the characters are introduced and the book settles itself into a well crafted rhythm. But as soon as you expect events to unfold, McEwan makes it perfectly clear that he plans to tell the story through his characters’ thoughts rather than their actions. And so, every thought, every conscious and sub conscious occurrence is dealt with in the most satisfying and elaborate fashion.

 

“….The cost of oblivious daydreaming was always this moment of return, the realignment with what had been before and now seemed a little worse. Her reverie, once rich in plausible details, had become a passing silliness before the hard mass of the actual……….Briony had lost her godly power of creation, but it was only at this moment of return that the loss became evident; part of a daydream’s enticement was the illusion that she was helpless before its logic.”

“…..She wanted to leave, she wanted to lie alone, face down on her bed and savour the vile piquancy of the moment, and go back down the lines of branching consequences to the point before the destruction began…..Self pity needed her full attention, and only in solitude could she breathe life into the lacerating details…”

 

 

And so we are subjected to the day dreaming of a 13 year old Briony, the subtleties of whose response to an unfulfilled expectation is explored in magnificent detail. But perhaps, what is of even more significance and relevance is Briony’s dangerous illusion of having attained adolescence. And it is as a result of the dangerous presence of this illusion that she convinces herself that she has indeed understood the true meaning of the event she witnesses on the garden from her window. By nightfall the same day, she finds herself involved in more situations where circumstances demand her to construe with maturity, and which she consciously does, but alas, under just the delusion of the same. And the illusion of her attaining a greater sense of responsibility, manifesting itself in her imagination, culminates during the early hours of the following day, when she accuses Robbie, the house keeper’s son, of a crime he didn’t commit. This one act, arising out of her assuming superficial responsibility, haunts her eventually as she then decides to spend the rest of her life trying to atone for the same.

 

McEwan’s attention to the conscious and the sub-conscious thoughts of his characters are portrayed in such convincing detail that he takes over 200 pages to describe the events of a single day. In it, we are subjected to Cecelia, Briony’s sister, and her unobtrusive lifestyle, having spent her entire college days in complete denial of her love to Robbie. And Robbie himself, who optimistically wishes to pursue a career in medicine, keeps his silence to himself and his thoughts from her. But how they let go of that unspoken and unacknowledged desire for each other in such an uninhibited manner, one night inside a library, is so beautifully described that even though the description goes into the minute details of their encounter, not at one moment, do you find the whole encounter offensive or objectionable. We also find Mrs. Tallis, the authority of the house, unwell as she usually finds herself to be, perceiving the actions of each and every person in her house through the walls of her bedroom. We meet Leon, Briony’s brother, and his friend Paul, the chocolate billionaire who are the guests for the night. Briony’s cousin Lola, who is a couple of years elder than Briony, also forms part of the homecoming celebration with her adolescent mindset, well set in.

Once you go beyond that one fateful day, McEwan  vehemently explores Robbie’s mind, as he reluctantly participates in a war filled with a reality that is dangerously unfamiliar to him. The delirious state of the military during the Dunkirk Retreat forms the backdrop of the surreal scenes of pain and hopelessness surrounding him as he walks miles and miles to the shore accompanied by a few of his buddies, with his only impetus for survival being the words that he carries on a sheet of paper in his breast pocket, Cecelia’s words : “I will wait for you. Come Back…” And amidst all the mind numbing tragedies around him, his only source of happiness and bliss, is his regular withdrawals from his memory bank- that one parting kiss that he shared with her just before he left for the war.

 

“…..He kissed her, lightly at first, but they drew closer, and when their tongues touched, a disembodied part of himself was abjectly grateful, for he knew he now had a memory in the bank and would be drawing on it for months to come. He was drawing on it now, in a French barn, in the small hours.”

“ ‘…..Realistically, there had to be a choice- you or them. How could it be both? I’ve never had a moment’s doubt. I love you. I believe in you completely. You are my dearest one, my reason for life. Cee.’….He knew these last lines by heart and mouthed them now in the darkness. My reason for life. Not Living, but life. That was the touch. And she was his reason for life, and why he must survive. He lay on his side, staring at where he thought the barn’s entrance was, waiting for the first signs of light. He was too restless for sleep now. He wanted only to be walking to the coast.”

 

The reason why this book captivates you is largely due to its ability to take the reader deep into the psyche of the characters and into what they are thinking. So much so, that the thoughts completely obviate the necessity of the actions. It also lies in the successful exploration of the concept of atonement- as seen through Briony’s voluntary effort to right what she wronged. Perhaps, a crucial scene in the book is one in which Briony is treating a young French soldier who is about to die. The French Soldier believes that she is his long lost love and continues to talk to her about the various things that he would do back home. And just before he dies in her arms, he calls out her name: “Tallis…..”, which Briony later realizes the difference in the way he said it. (“……She could still hear his voice, the way he said Tallis, turning it into a girl’s name…”) There are plenty more instances in the book which fill the reader with such a satisfied quality experience that it is difficult not to go through the last pages of the book filled with awe and wonder.

But there is nothing more moving and complete than the way the concept of Atonement is encapsulated in the words of an ageing Briony:

“…How can a novelist achieve atonement when, with her absolute power of deciding outcomes, she is also God? ……No atonement for God, or novelists, even if they are atheists. …”

 

One of the most compelling and satisfying reads ever. No wonder this book was chosen as one among the Times Best 100 Books. And no wonder it was made into an Oscar nominated movie by the same name. But no level of film making can get the beauty of the written words onto the screen. A must read for all book fanatics.

 

 

And Thus Spake D’Mello….

Considering the fact that my first job has not really helped my posting frequency, it has now become imperative for me to take steps to discontinue my indifferent treatment to my blog. It has been a long time since I churned out the handbag expedition post. And in that, I had also dealt with how Mr. Fate seems to be so very concerned about me and my future and how He always seemed to so easily tell me “I don’t think I can let you have this, or that, or for that matter anything that you deem really important!” But then I guess He eventually got bored of stabbing me and decided to just sit and watch all the fun. And as a result, here I am- in my first job- as a Project Assistant at IISc. Decent pay for doing something I like to do. Project is good. Work is good. Meeting new people. Making new friends. And I guess on the whole, life seems to be returning back to being filled with brighter prospects for the future. And that’s as far as I can go to say myself to be settled.

But something about the project was initially bothering me to a large extent. Having specialized in Soil Engineering at every step of my B.Tech, I was a little apprehensive about this present project of mine as it was based on Environmental Engineering. And so as I was talking to my close friend Royan D’Mello about how I felt I was being unfaithful to Soil Engineering by taking up a project in Environmental Engineering, he made some spontaneous remarks that have somehow stuck with me even now. Check this out, this is what he said:

“Look man you don’t worry about that. You can look at it this way. Think of you being married to Soil Engineering and that you want to have a baby (the baby corresponding to me doing my higher studies in Soil Engg) but you can’t due to some constraints. And so now, think of Environmental Engg as a Surrogate Mother who is just helping you have the baby. So its not like you are cheating on Soil Engg. Its just that you are making use of Envi Engg to strengthen your ties with Soil Engg!”

And that somehow put everything into place and I felt more confident about my project and my future prospects. I really do not know how this guy suddenly comes up with these analogies. But good for me, it helped me put things in the right perspective. And so as per his suggestion in a comment that he put in the previous Stab post, I now officially declare myself to be DE-STABBED!

And also of notice, is that my second shot at GRE is going to take place this October 1^st. Come to think of it, this is actually my first shot, considering the fact that I never really wrote the GRE last time around! And yes, my passport is already on its way this time.

So there you have it. Something worthwhile that has indeed happened to me in my life at last.

PS: Apology Accepted.

Going to God’s Own Country

Given the fact that my blogging frequency is competing hard with the frequency of the Indian Cricket team’s success, I’d rather not make excuses on why it is so. Instead, I am just going to say that I am leaving to Trivandrum today, by way of a 17 hour bus journey spanning each of the 760 kms and will be back only on Tuesday. And when I come back, I hope to write about a whole load of stuff that has happened over the past 2 weeks. This include:

1. The Weekend Party at my home
2. The Chetan Bhagat Phenomenon as it took place with my friend Logik.
3. Some wise words by  Royan D’Mello
4. My views on the alarmingly high number of reality shows on TV
5. The De-Stab Post
6. The upcoming Indian Bands gig in Bangalore on August 24
7. My Experience in God’s Own Country
8. About a few interestng blogs I read up in the holidays.
9. Book reviews on Atonement by Ian Mcewan and A House for Mr.Biswas by V S Naipaul

So thats what I plan to do after I come back. How many of them I will end up doing - no idea!

So till then-Chao!